boredom without work piling up waiting for you to finish your makeshift me-time is a privilege that no one realize. there's only several people who got those things without asking and they didnt know about it. its babies. they could so shit and cry and shit their pants and being cute all the damn time. anyway, february is a really confusing month for me and i got that bored privilege, so i abuse it back to back until i feel like i need to fucking do something before im spiraling into those dark times i had in covid times. crazy to realize that it was almost seven years ago. that is somebody kid age! i dont really remember what i did when i was seven, it was really exhausting to live as a kid. no one want to admit nor accept about what happened on their early age, so it was puzzling.
excuse my poorly hidden my chemical romance references in this post because its raining cats and dogs outside and im currently listening to my playlist to blast out You Know What They Do to Guys Like Us in Prison on repeat. i think i would kill a karaoke session with that song, or maybe some fall out boy's infinity on high album. this is the first time in march i listen to my chemical romance again after weeks of 5sos, frank iero, circa survive, and fall out boy yelling and screaming on my ears like i put them on a gunpoint.
i found a stark difference (and its quite funny for me) to realize how i avidly avoiding k-pop boygroups such as seventeen and monsta x and some solo songs when i feel terribly depressed because those would put me in a situation where my hands would bleed. i remember damn well how i suddenly feel so, so gloomy after habit by seventeen suddenly shows up after i played hot. its so funny and really sad at the same time because what the hell? what the fuck? it feels like someone flicks out the switch as woozi quietly sing. i dont really think that i listened to k-pop as diligent as i used to be back then. finding out frank iero does changed my life to be better and i feel like i passed some rites of passages.
my current favorite song back to back is fame < infamy by fall out boy. i dont think my music taste would change drastically in a day, because i knew fall out boy waaaaay longer than people think, i just focused and learn about it since last year. i knew fall out boy from their uma thurman and big hero 6. i knew my chemical romance because my father introduced me to black parade when i was in elementary school and its so fucking funny to realize the accidental pun i put there. i listened to this aint a scene, its an arm race because of a reels. its fascinating to see how our surroundings affects our music taste.
related to that matter, i only respect people who curate their own music taste and not purely leaning into whatever they got on their bedazzled for you page. i dont think its bad to use fyp because i did that too, but what i mean is that they use fyp as a tool to see, listen, and understand about the music more rather than listening and seeing the trends. its sad to see some great songs viewed as 'that one trend' rather than 'oh that beautiful gut-wrenching song i love so much it makes me so sick and threw up a lot', you know. its painful to communicate with someone who got the same music taste as mine and when i tried to talk about it they only shrug and say, "oh i dont know. i only like it."
i may be dramatic and may agree with it, but i said its painful because music could be used as a vessel, not a mere media only. we could linked with each other as we talk about my chem's discography and finding out each other's interpretation of na na na na na, we could talk about ray toro's guitar skills, and so much more. we could talk about the artwork, the merch, the promotion, EVERYTHING. music is a really good way of connecting to people because to me, music is not that simple.
fuck i kept talking about music again.
this week, im learning more about post-hardcore, especially glassjaw. i knew them from pinterest (woah?) after i saw this picture:
woah, right? i was pretty mesmerized by him because: his neat teeth, his face expression, and his name. daryl palumbo.. that sounds too cool somehow. like ??? what a cool ass last name and i definitely will search up about that later.
anyway, i found out that he's the frontman of head automatica and glassjaw. i havent look up on head automatica yet, but im very interested at glassjaw's material control cover album because ITS FUCKING HELVETICA FONT. oh. oh! and their logo also use helvetica too. my gasted were flabbered and i immediately listened to ape dos mil. it was a very interesting journey of me trying to listen and understand the song at first impression because i did not expect it at all, its pretty unique for me and their music videos are super cool too. im interested! his voice are something else. ape dos mil is very whiny and it felt so goopy. listen to it and maybe you will understand what i meant.
my current favorite songs from glassjaw are tip your bartender, shira, and my conscience weighs a ton. apparently glassjaw is a post-hardcore band, so im super happy to found them because their songs pretty much lined up with my favorite sounds! i dont think i would like them all, but i will do a deep dive sooner or later to comb up my ultimate playlist of glassjaw. im a little bit surprised because trust me when i said i did not expect daryl's voice, i really did not expect it to be like that.
im hoping that i could explore and find many good bands more this year. its heavy to see how i slowly grew apart from k-pop, but i still could enjoy them and tuning in even though im going to play shit ton of old monsta x and seventeen songs. the groove i felt when rain came up on my playlist after ashton's breakup feels sooo good and nothing could EVER top that feeling at all because it feels so raw i think my primal instinct went up high through the roof.
well, what's the worst thing i could say?